Thursday, March 25, 2010

Hip and with it . . .

I've told you all before that I don't have much street cred. I mean, I listen to country and contemporary Christian stations so I'm not really up on today's Top 40 music scene. I have no idea what Jay-Z looks like, am more than slightly afraid of Snoop Dog, and say sentences like "I don't mind a song with 'some raps' in it." My friends at work decided that they needed to intervene so that I don't keep embarrassing them with my ignorance so they gave me a list of stations that I had to begin listening to immediately. Since then I've been listening to Top 40 stations every day and have to admit that I feel cooler already. Plus, as a bonus, I've found some songs that I really like.

I've also found some songs that make me laugh out loud in my car. Seriously - some of the lyrics in these songs are RIDICULOUS. For instance . . .

Tik Tok - Ke$ha (please note how hip-and-with-it I am for remembering that she spells her name with a $ . . .):
Now, the dudes are lining up cause they hear we got swagger
But we kick ‘em to the curb unless they look like Mick Jagger

Wait. Really? Don't you mean "We kick 'em to the curb IF they look like Mick Jagger?" I mean, have you SEEN him? Can I have your rejects?


Nothin' on You - B.O.B.
baby you the whole package
plus you pay your taxes

Well, that was a stretch. Seems like he could've come up with something better than that. But, hey - looks like he has his priorities in order . . .?


Bedrock - Young Money:
My room is the G-Spot
Call me Mr. Flintstone - I can make your Bedrock.

Wow. I just . . . - I don't . . . - Did he . . . - wow.


Sexy Bitch - David Guetta:
She's nothing like a girl you've ever seen before
Nothing you can compare to your neighborhood whore
I'm trynna find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful

[Well . . . you could start by not using the word "whore" in a song about her. But that's okay. Rookie mistake - anyone could make it. Keep going . . .]

The way, that booty movin' - I can't take no more
Have to stop what I'm doin', so I can pull up her close
I'm tryinna find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful

Damn Girl!!!
Damn, you's a sexy bitch, sexy bitch!
Damn, you's a sexy bitch!

Damn Girl!!!
Damn, you's a sexy bitch, sexy bitch!
Damn, you's a sexy bitch!

Damn Girl!!

Oh boy. Okay. Ummmmm . . . maybe we should get on the same page about what you mean by "disrespectful" . . .


Please - please, for the love of God - GIVE ME MY GEORGE STRAIT BACK.

7 comments:

Christi said...

L.M.A.O!!!

Ms. E said...

AMEN. 'Nuff said.

Erin said...

umm..okay Catchy, you earned some cool points for sure, but then I have to take them back because it's spelled Tik Tok. Gah. Plus, Snoop is real sweet now. He is like a really tall, really skinny teddy bizzle. What? Now, I lost cool points!!!

The last song was cracking me up!

Catherine said...

Okay - I fixed the name of the song, Erin. I have to be cool!!

Nora said...

Snoop is a degenerate pig.

Christen said...

OMG so funny! i went to the JZ concert here in Denver on monday and I soooo wish you were there! It would have been great just to see your face as the songs were played and the pot was smoked! I do miss your everyday, in person commentary!

ellen said...

I think my favorite one was the guy who gave props to the girl (see what I did there?) for paying her taxes. I start thinking about this apparent hardened criminal element he must be running around with--Martha Stewart, maybe? I mean, it's like saying, "You're awesome because you don't steal stuff from the gas station." Thanks! Glad to know that the standards bar isn't quite so high.