Tuesday, March 8, 2011

Message erased.

I consider myself to be a peace-loving person, I really do. And I'd like to think that most of the time people would find me to be mild-mannered, calm, and in control of my emotions. There's just not a lot that will ruffle my feathers.

But there is one thing that will whip me up into a murderous rage in mere seconds. And it happened to me this weekend . . .

Me: [dialing phone number of friend]
Phone: [ring! ring!]
Me: [waiting]
Phone: [ring! ring! ring! ring!]
Me: [still waiting]
Phone: Hi. This is Missy. I'm sorry I missed your call. Please leave a message and I'll return your call as soon as I can. Thanks! [pause] To leave a call-back number, press 5. To leave a message, wait for the tone.
Me: [yeah, I know.]
Phone: When you are finished with this call, hang up or press "star."
Me: [I knooooooooooooooooooow!!]
Phone: [beep!]
Me: Hey, Missy! It's Catherine. I saw that I missed your call so I was just calling you ba-
Phone: Message erased. To re-record your message, press 3. To end this call, hang up or press "star."
Me: [breathe, Catherine.] [pressing 3 . . .]
Phone: Record your message after the tone. [beep!]
Me: Hey, Missy! It's Catherine. I saw that I missed your call earlier today and I'm so sorry that I'm just now calling you back but I -
Phone: If you are happy with your message, press 1. To erase and re-record, press 3. To end this call, hang up or press "star."
Me: [(through gritted teeth . . .) Stupid son of a . . .] [pressing 3 angrily]
Phone: Record your message after the tone. [beep!]
Me: Hi, Missy! It's Catherine. Sorry that I'm just now getting back to you - it's been kind of a crazy day. Call me when -
Phone: Message erased. To re-record your message, press -
Me: [(yelling into phone) IHATEYOUIHATEYOUIHATEYOUIHATEYOU!!] [pressing 3 . . . begrudgingly.]
Phone: [beep!]
Me: Hi, Missy! It's Catherine. Call me.

Aaaaaaaaaaaand that's when I start hitting the star button manically, while pursing my lips, gritting my teeth, and cursing quietly under my breath.

So next time I'm just texting Missy . . .

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