Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Oh Dating in the Dark, I love to hate you!

So I watched Dating in the Dark again last night and it was awkward and wonderful as usual. This week's episode was about three guys named Jeff, Amit, and Cormac and three girls named Shannon, Misty, and Kelly. Same set up: the girls live in one wing of the house, the guys in the other, and they only "meet" in a dark room where they can't see anything at all. But, thanks to the infrared cameras, we can see it all . . .

So they all six meet in the dark room. The girls come in first and they decide that they are going to be super quiet so that they guys won't know they're in there. Sure enough, when the guys come in they think they are alone. Until Shannon breaks into a giggle fit. You know the kind of giggle fit you have when you're nervous and someone says something only mildly amusing that you should only give a courtesy laugh to at best but, instead, you find yourself snorting and wiping mascara from under your eyes? Anyone? Anyone? Well, poor Shannon ends up laughing a little too hard and blows their cover. That was when I realized that Shannon might have a little crazy in her . . .

During the group date, it becomes obvious that Jeff and Shannon like each other, Amit and Misty like each other, and Cormac and Kelly like each other. Not surprisingly, that's how they pair off for their individual dates. Nothing too exciting happened on those and I was disappointed.

BUT THEN . . . the guys and girls get a chance to take a video tour of each other's houses. I think that this could be interesting because the contestants didn't know that their houses were going to be videoed for this tour. I'm expecting to see unmade beds, a pile of laundry on the bathroom floor, and kleenexes on the nightstand . . . you know - what they would see at MY house . . . so I got all excited for it. But, alas, it seems as if the contestants had been warned . . . and HGTV had re-decorates their homes just in time.

Except for Shannon . . .

Her house is awesome. They open up the cabinets and we see that everything is disorganized and I think I even saw some trash thrown in there, too. I might have just imagined that, though, but I was too lazy to rewind it to make sure. Then they show her sink and it's full of ants. The guys are grossed out by that and look at each other, unable to really speak. Jeff's love of her appears unaffected. He will accept her, ants and all.

I do love a good love story.

They go on dates again and Jeff asks Shannon about the ants. She does her laugh again and I think "Poor girl." I'm starting to like her because she just seems so normal. I'm starting to feel defensive for her and I keep saying "It's not like they were a bunch of ROACHES." Then I realize that I'm arguing with the television and it's going nowhere. So now Shannon finally gets to explain the ant situation. And I'm ready. I mean, I had an apartment with a bad ant problem in college so I know it can happen. So poor Shannon needs to be vindicated with a perfectly good explanation. She giggles and explains that she had been killing them but then she started feeling bad karma.

Huh??

And then she decided she was just going to become one with the ants.

What the . . .?? Sorry, Shannon - I couldn't hear you because my Crazy Radar was going off. Did you say that you wanted to become one with the ants??

Then they show the guys making a toast with one another and Cormac says "Here's to Fire. Not the ferocious kind that brings down shack or shanty but the sultry kind that brings down pant or panty." I roll my eyes and decided I don't like him.

Jeff goes on his next date with Shannon and brings dessert to feed her. Why do these people keep doing the whole feeding each other thing? Don't they realize that they are going to be in the pitch black?? It's just so awkward. I love it every time.

Then Amit and Misty have their next date. We find Amit alone in the room doing the I'm-getting-myself-psyched-up boxing in place thing and I whisper to him that he's being videoed and that we can see him. Misty walks in and we see that she's brought her hula hoops for them to use. Of course she has - that makes sense, right? This is the strangest date idea to date . . . why is this fun when they can't see each other? So they hula hoop and giggle and I scrunch up my "this is stupid" face. Then they decide to box each other. In the dark. Since they don't want to really punch each other, they end up doing their best imitation of a 6th grade girl fight. I'm tired of Amit and Misty's date.

Then Cormac and Kelly meet in the room and Cormac has brought his guitar in to sing Kelly a song. They are sitting on the ground and he's serenading her. It's awkward to watch and I find myself actually wishing he were trying to feed her, instead. Then he tells Kelly something about how research has shown that you can tell a lot about someone by a kiss. Mayday! Mayday! I start yelling to warn Kelly to watch her pants and panties.

But the awkwardness isn't over yet. The producers have decided that the show isn't uncomfortable enough so they are sending the couples in for one last date. It's a theme date and the theme is Dancing in the Dark. I can't report much from those dates because I spent too much time with my hands over my eyes. Watching bad dancers is bad enough but watching them dance in the dark . . . it's just too much for my little eyes to handle.

Then it's time for the reveal.

Shannon and Jeff see each other and are pleased as punch. Shannon is crying and shaking and just can't believe how adorable he is. She thinks he has a good energy about him so it seems like a good match. Plus, we know she won't try to kill him because that would be bad karma.

Cuckoooooooooooo! Cuckoooooooooooooo!!

Amit and Misty see each other and both look disappointed. She thinks he's cute but he's too short for her. He thinks she isn't the kind of girl he'd approach in a bar. Is that the standard we're supposed to be using??

Finally Cormac and Kelly get to see each other and Kelly is disappointed because Cormac is too good looking and looks like he could be a catalog model. Ummmmmmm . . . come again? That's a BAD thing? Ladies and gentlemen, we have our first case of reverse discrimination on this show. This is a ground-breaking series, friends. Ground breaking.

So then the the guys go out on the balcony and wait to see if their chosen gal will come out. This is the part of the show I both dread and desire. I turn up the volume and pop in some Imodium AD as a preventive measure.

First, Jeff goes out. He's really nervous to see if Shannon will come out on the balcony. He looks at the balcony door then at the front door then back to the balcony door. I shout "Stupid show! I love this show!" Then the front door opens and Shannon walks out, leaving poor Jeff up on the balcony by himself. I'm so confused at this point because she was JUST crying and shaking and talking about how adorable he was. There's only one conclusion we can draw, folks: Chick's CRAZY.

Then Amit goes out there. He's excited to see if Misty will join him. But she really can't get past the height so she goes out the front door. He talks about how this whole situation takes him back to his childhood when he was pushed aside because of his looks. I'm so depressed at this point that I actually try cutting my wrists with my dog's toenails.

Then Cormac comes out to wait on Kelly. She's inside agonizing over whether she can deal with a guy who's so good looking. I'm on my couch shouting "Why God?? Why??" But she chooses him in the end. And I think that was the right choice. I mean, he's a terrible toaster but they did have good chemistry. And she can always just close her eyes and picture someone ugly when she's kissing him . . .?

Oh Dating in the Dark . . . why must I love you so??

10 comments:

Christi said...

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My lordy... I am STILL LAUGHING!!!! (thanks Catch- you just got a room full of us in trouble. Love you!

Emma said...

That is soooooo whacky!

Erin said...

CATHERINE!!! You HAVE to remind me next time this is on!! So dang funny!

Phyllis Eddings said...

Catherine, I hope you're not watching this show alone. This could be a serious problem. Immodium? You are waayyyy too invested in these people, if that's what you need.

Watching this with a group could be entertaining, because you could spend the whole time making fun of them, but watching alone? I'm thinking that's a warning sign...professional help could be called for.
LOL Love you.

Melissa said...

Oh how I love to hate it with you!

Unknown said...

Hello its Amit from the show and wow i love the way you put this out there.

so first let me say no one came to decorate our houses, we did know that they would come but we only had an hour window on a certain day, so its not fixed, the show is Real, we lived in the house for 4 days and had no access to phone internet tv or the outside world at all, if you have any questions please let me know, i kept it as real as i can, yes it is a show and they do a lot of editing but for the most part it is Real, that can also be a reason some people didnt like the show or thought it was lame, remember people this isnt MTV, its ABC, i dont know how wild they could of made it.

Overall i thank all that posted comments, good or bad i am a good sport and its fun to see how people reacted to the show.

Thanks Again
Amit
Amitvhl@aol.com

Kelly Biddlecome said...

Of all the re-caps I could find in search of how I was perceived on national television, yours is officially my favorite. Cormac and I hung out for a weekend after the show and after trying really hard to like him, we all got drunk and he hooked up with one of my friends - no hard feelings though, I wasn't that into him after he did the toast for the first time, the second, the third and so on.... :) Thanks for writting a cool review that made me smile.

Catherine said...

Wow! Thanks for the inside scoop, y'all! Amit, I actually DID think that y'all were just great decorators and housekeepers! And Kelly, I can't believe what happened after the show. That's crazy. PLEASE tell me he didn't REALLY keep making that toast!!! :) My eyes are involuntarily rolling into the back of my head just thinking about it . . .

Thank y'all for being good sports and filling us in!

Unknown said...

Thanks for your genuine point of view Catherine! I will agree with Amit in saying that they filmed us for 4 1/2 days and cut it down to 43 minutes, so there are a lot of ways to skin that cat!

The toast! I am still laughing at that and am surprised they used it... Lets just say we were doing a lot of toasting during those days in the house! muah...

Too pretty?! HAHA My friends have been giving me a truckload of crap over that one! Lets be serious and dig a little deeper here. If a person says someone is "too pretty," (EVEN after getting to know them w/o knowing what they look like!) what does that really tell you about the person saying it?

As far as after the show: I will gladly privately share what really happened but not on here as fodder.

It was a really fun experience and would do it again!

Best,

Cormac
Cormacpara@gmail.com

Anonymous said...

Oh someone please tell me what's jeff doing now. He was so cute :-) I watched the episode only today! :-/